Retirement or Higher Education?

A friend who works with the same company that I do, but now lives in another city, sent me this today. We both have the same dream of leaving that company, so even though neither one of us is really close to retirement age, the idea of leaving in any way possible often comes up.

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They asked a retiree the following questions:

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1) How many days are there in a week? Six Saturdays and one Sunday

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2) When is a retiree's bedtime? Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

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3) How many retirees does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it might take all day.

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4) What's the biggest gripe of retirees? There is just not enough time to get everything done.

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5) Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors? The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

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6) Among retirees what is considered formal attire? Tied shoes.

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7) Why do retirees count pennies? They are the only ones who have the time.

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8) What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire? NUTS!

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9) Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage? They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

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10) What do retirees call a long lunch? Normal.

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11) What is the best way to describe retirement? The never ending Coffee Break.

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12) What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree? If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

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13) Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with? He is too polite to tell the whole truth.

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14) What do you do all week? Monday to Friday; nothing. Saturday and Sunday I rest.

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Now to be honest, most of these questions reminded me of being a college student: When is a college student's bedtime? Three hours after he falls asleep on the floor. Why don't college students mind being called kids? Because the term comes with a student discount, student loans, easy student credit cards, little responsibility, and money from home. How many college students does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it might take all semester. You get the idea. Any way you think about it; it's hard to change. People are people--from cradle to grave.

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~ rachman

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